Ezekiel Turnbull, yesterday in Clearwater, Florida, was greeted at a local Ponderosa eatin' house with a vision of the Flying Spaghetti Monster most uncommonly on a plate of noodles. Turnbull's 5 year old son had ordered innocently from the children's menu and their table greeted with this immaculate sight where touched by his noodley appendage.
A long-time Scientologist, E. Turnbull was blown over when faced with this deific image of our Lord FSM in the form of refined starch products and 'acquired' meat. The Carbolith himself had surely visited their table that night, he thought.
Turnbull, a 28 year old accountant, nutter and sycophant could not believe his eyes. "What have I been wasting my life on? L. Ron Hubbard was never this delicious!" he stated knowingly, as the inner workings of Scientology include eating of Hubbard's flesh in the form of suet and drinking of his blood in the form grape drink (not to be mistaken with grape juice) in the holy communion of Hgejk'dshioogkdaf, King of the Lizard Men.
The astounding appearance of our Lord of Ragu and Garlic has inspired a special sectarian cult of spaghettiotide adherents in Clearwater, Florida... much to the dismay of the Dianetics Foundation who were heard to state hide your pad and get out of there -- they'll ruin the whole deal! as they skulked off into a locked compound with a wooden statue of a Wookie holding cigars perched in front of a panel marked Chamber of Knowledge, Wisdom and Internet Pr0n smeared across the entrance way in indelible ink.
Word from within Hubbard's main compound outlines detailed plans to drink Kool Aid and arsenic while dancing around naked dressed as spacemen recounting the days when Tom Cruise didn't suck. The dude with the plastic vulcan ears, who could only comment in Klingon remarked to the press; yImev jat wIj chIS Hergh!
